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Love In Limbo. What can one say about Love In Limbo? Not much, I'm afraid. It's like an earlier version of American Pie, only it's set in Australia and there's no pie. Wait, I take that back. There is a pie in this movie, but it isn't violated in the same way as the pie in that other movie.
Russell Crowe is in this movie, although as a supporting character. One wonders why he is in this movie, but I'm sure he had his reasons. Like perhaps the rent was due that month or something. Or maybe he thought playing a nerd would round out his resume.
As I said, the movie is set in Australia. The time is the late Fifties. Our hero is Kenny Riddle, a teenager who lives in Perth with his twin sister Ivy and widowed mother Gwen.
Gwen keeps a roof over her family's head by sewing and designing dresses for a small clientele out of her home. Kenny is at that age where he's nothing but a walking hormone. He has a lucrative side job at school selling drawings of naked women, but he gets caught and tossed out. Apparently this isn't the first time he's been expelled from a school, and Mom is at her wits end on what to do with him. So she sends Kenny to Uncle Bert, an upper management fellow at a wholesale clothing factory. He gets Kenny a job there at Bollinger's.
Keep a sharp eye out. As Bert is introducing Kenny around, this is where we first see Russell. He plays a Welshman named Arthur, an uptight, geeky supervisor. If this movie was your first time at the Russell Crowe Experience, you would never, ever imagine this same actor playing a brutal cop, a skinhead Neo Nazi, or a homicidal virtual reality program. As Arthur, Russell is a complete nerd. It's not just the way he's dressed, but the way he carries himself. His lips are pursed, his head and neck sticks out like a bird, his shoulders are hunched, and he walks like he's got a walnut up his butt. Perhaps this is what drew him to the part: a challenge for this mucho macho man to convincingly play a wimp.
Also, we meet Max Wiseman, sales representative for the company. Max is your quintessential playboy. He's got it all - the sharp suit, the fast car, the talk, the walk, the skinny mustache and the big teeth. In short, Max is everything Kenny wants to be. Max takes young Ken under his wing, instructing the boy on how to really have finesse with the ladies.
Giving the lad a lift home, Max is introduced to Ken's mom Gwen. He's quite taken with the lovely woman, but Mom's dating this older man. Ken isn't too keen on the old guy. In fact, he's not been happy with any of the men his mother has dated. There's a long boring sequence as we see Gwen realizes she's not happy with old geezer, either. (There's also a rather disturbing sequence, in my opinion, of Ken helping his mother out of a dress which I've decided to skip.)
Ken is doing well at his job. He gets along with the workers, including this elderly Greek woman, Mrs. Costasomethingorother, and a new guy on the job, Barry. Barry's the part Russell would normally have played. Speaking of Russell, here he comes again. Be quick! Arthur breezes into the scene, has a fit because Barry has stripped down to an undershirt, and is gone again. Really, that's all he does. Come back, Russell! Save this movie!
But alas, he's gone.
Max calls Gwen with a business proposition. He's impressed with her dress designs and thinks he can help her with all his contacts he's got. But we know that's not all he wants to help her with.
Ken and Barry acquire a cheap car. With newfound confidence, Ken asks his sister's friend Maisie to the drive in. He also arranges for Barry to take Ivy as his date. There's a long boring sequence that eventually ends with Maisie and Barry getting together, and brother and sister left out of the fun.
But don't feel too bad for poor Ken. Not long after he meets Mrs. Costasomethingorother's daughter, Elaine. We find out that Maisie has dumped poor Barry. Arthur breezes in (yet again) to throw Barry and Ken out of Max's office. Really, that's all he does.
There's an unfunny sequence involving that pie I was telling you about. As revenge, Ken and Barry get ahold of Arthur's lunch (which looks like some kind of pot pie to me) and put a rubber snake in it. But Arthur gets to have dinner with the big shots and gives his lunch away to Mrs. Costasomethingorother. She discovers the snake in her lunch. Blah, blah, blah. I'm not laughing.
Young Arthur turns 21, and Ken and Barry ask him to buy them booze. Ah, at last Arthur can become part of The Group, get drunk, let his greased hair down and loosen up.
Max invites Gwen out for a business dinner. She expects other people to be there as well, but when they get to the restaurant, Gwen realizes that no one else is going to show up. She also notices that the staff of the restaurant all know Max. Quickly she surmises that this is his regular place to take all his women on dates. Gwen didn't just fall off the turnip truck and she's not having this nonsense and walks out. They're either going to have a strictly business relationship or they're not going to have any relationship at all. You go, Gwen!
Ken, Barry and Arthur travel all night to get to another town where there is a well known cat house. They drive, the car breaks down, they fix it, they drive. Nothing very interesting goes on. Arthur worries about venereal diseases.
Gwen's business is picking up with Max's help. In high spirits, she decides to allow Max another chance. He takes her back to the same restaurant, but this time she's there to have a good time. She's having such a good time, she doesn't seem to notice her young son is gone. The next day, Max rings up Gwen and invites her along for a day of sailing. She accepts. They have a fun time and become close. Very close, if you know what I mean, and I think you do.
Also that day, the boys finally arrive at their destination. They're not sure if they're at the right house, and to Ken and Barry's surprise, Arthur volunteers to find out. He approaches the place, sees the tell-tale red light, and hurries back to tell the other guys this is it. Ken and Barry go inside, but Arthur chickens out and stays in the car. Perhaps Russell wanted some quiet time to reflect and wonder how this movie will effect his career.
Ken and Barry are greeted by the Madam, who tries to rouse her girls from bed. The prostitutes all complain that it's too early in the morning to do business. They bicker and bitch for awhile, but never fear, the boys finally achieve manhood. Except for Arthur. He retains his purity.
Outside, Arthur in the car draws the suspicion of the town's (only?) cop. He runs a check on the car and informs the boys that it's really stolen. I'm assuming the cop impounds the vehicle, because now we see the boys having to wait for a train to take them back home. It's at the empty train station that we hear Russell sing Amazing Grace, which I tried to make a .wav file of but it didn't come out clear at all. Sorry.
Back at the factory, Ken gets a call from the health department telling him he's been exposed to VD and he'd better come in for a check-up. Ken agonizes for days over the fate of his vital body parts, until it's revealed that it was a crank call from Max.
Ken discovers that Max has been seeing his mother on a more personal basis. Fearing that Gwen is just another one of the playboy's conquests, Ken tries to fight him but Max overpowers the young boy. The two go for a talk where Max confides in Ken that Gwen is different from the other women, and that Max may have actually fallen for his mother.
It's Christmas time. There's a party at the factory, where they set
up a fashion show of Gwen's designs. Barry gets back with Maisie. Arthur
sees Ivy for the first time and falls for her. Ken gives his blessing of
Gwen and Max's relationship. Ken gets with Elaine. Everyone's got someone.
Everyone's happy.
